Three Little Pigstitues and the Big Pimp W Diddy
by AngelSixSixSix
Summary: This is a play on The Three Little Pigs. In this story, the pigs are "pig"stitutes, and the Big Pimp Wolf Diddy is their pimp. I wrote this for an assignment in English. It involves sex, violence, and drugs. Enjoy! 8 D


Erica L. Ober

Period: 2

5~26~11

The Three Little Pigstitutes and the Big Pimp Wolf Diddy

Once upon a time, there were three hard-working pigstitutes working for the Big Pimp Wolf Diddy. He was a very mean wolf that beat, threatened, and worked the poor pigstitues way too hard for hardly any pay.  
>One day, the Big Pimp Wolf Diddy went to go check on his pigstitutes to make sure they were prepared for the night's work ahead. He came to the first pigstitute's house that was constructed of cardboard boxes in an alley.<p>

"Pig! PIG! Get out here!" Wolf Diddy shouted menacingly.

The pigstitute fearfully shouted back, "No! Not by the fetus in my tummy tum tum!"  
>Enraged at this news, Wolf Diddy growled, "What? How are you supposed to make me money with that thing there? I'm going to pull out my gun, load it, and blow your brains out!"<p>

With that, Wolf Diddy took out his gun, loaded it, and shot a whole round of bullets at the box. He enjoyed the squeals of terror coming from inside.

After all was quiet, Wolf Diddy ripped through the ruined box to find the dead pigstitute. He gobbled her up to dispose of the body, using the fetus's umbilical cord to floss when he was finished.

Big Pimp Wolf Diddy was quite livid about the pigstitute's fate. He thought to himself as he walked, _That's going to cost me, dang it!_

Arriving at the next pigstitute's house- which consisted of a flimsy structure of branches and blankets to mimic a tent-like structure under the city's bridge- still angry at the last pigstitute's news.

"Pig! PIG! Get out here!" he shouted.

Just like the last pigstitute she shouted affrightedly, "No! Not by the fetus in my tummy tum tum!"

"What? What is this? Mating season? Fine. Then I'll pull out my gun, load it, and blow your brains out!" The Big Pimp Wolf Diddy shouted, enraged by the second dose of this news in one day. He would lose so much money with only one pigstitute to get the job done!

Then, just as he said, Wolf Diddy whipped out his gun, loaded it, and shot a full round of bullets at the pigstitute through the weak walls of the shelter. Again, he was filled with joy out the sound of her cries and squeals of terror.

After all grew quite, Wolf Diddy picked his way through the crimson-stained blankets to find the bloody pig. As the last pigstitute, he ate her up to dispose of the evidence and used the fetus's umbilical cord to floss his teeth.

The Big Pimp Wolf Diddy was furious now. He set off to the last pigstitute's house- that happened to be an abandoned building- craving the moment when he could release his pent up wrath on her.

When he arrived at the abandoned building, he shouted and rapped on the door violently, "Pig! PIG! Get out here!"

This pigstitute also having a fetus in her tummy tum tum, was hoping to soften the impact when she told Wolf Diddy; though she was not hopeful. She managed to get her hands on some pure cat-caine, which she chopped up into six lines of fine powder for her master to indulge in.

The pigstitute opened the door to the fuming Wolf Diddy, "Master, why don't you come in?" She asked sensually. "I have some pure cat-caine for you, a gift Sir."

"Pure cat-caine?" he exclaimed, "Let me in!"

Wolf Diddy shoved the pigstitute aside, crashing her into a wall probably leaving a nasty bruise. He then dove into the table with the cat-caine lines, nose first sniffing up all of it. By this time, the pigstitute was done recovering and walked into the room where Wolf Diddy was. She gasped seeing him seizing on the floor, foaming at the mouth, and making deranged pimp-wolf noises. She gasped again when she noticed ALL of that cat-caine was gone. She couldn't believe he had done all of that at once!

Suddenly, all was quite.

The pigstitute looked down to see the Big Pimp Wolf Diddy dead.

Epilogue

After the Big Pimp Wolf Diddy's death, the pigstitute was able to finally live quietly and peacefully. Though, she realized she wouldn't always have such a kindred environment once the kid came along, so one day she "accidently" fell down a flight of stairs that just happened to have a coat-hanger on the landing… Needless to say, the piglet isn't with us anymore.

In other news, the pigstitute is now self-employed and on a very successful 4k plan. She also is able to afford a house, and a small filming studio for making promotional films for her business.

The End


End file.
